The Alternative

‘I’m sure there’s another way Lily. Why he’s behaving like this is beyond me,’ Daniel stated, softly. He was holding onto Lily’s hand whilst watching her sleep. ‘I refuse to believe in all this destruction nonsense. I will not watch my friend destroy himself. I will not watch some higher power destroy him either.’

He placed a light kiss on Lily’s wrist. ‘So soft,’ he whispered, as his eyes darkened.

‘Don’t worry, I will sort it out,’ Daniel continued. He slowly loosened her grip and stood up. Running his hand through his brown hair, he groaned loudly. ‘There goes my neat hair. I don’t even have a comb with me.’

Walking towards the window, he pulled up the blinds and looked out at the darkness that engulfed the hospital. ‘Exactly Kray’s mood.’

‘So what next, Daniel?’

Daniel turned towards the door and watched Kray look in. He wasn’t staring at Daniel, his eyes were focused on Lily alone.

‘What do you mean?’ Daniel raised his eyebrows and asked.

‘I mean like, Lily,’ Kray began slowly. ‘What do we tell her? About all this?’ He continued quietly, without once removing his eyes from her.

‘Well, I’ve cleaned up all the mess you left. So what exactly is ‘all this’ you’re referring to? I mean, she won’t notice anything different. So, go on, I’ve had enough of assuming things,’ Daniel responded with annoyance. He didn’t much like being spoken in riddles. He didn’t much like someone talking to him whilst looking elsewhere either.

‘Kray, look at me,’ Daniel added.

Kray flicked his eyes towards Daniel. A smile began forming on his lips. ‘What do you mean by not watch some high power destroy me?’ Scrunching his eyes slightly, he sent a piercing look. ‘Does it mean that you’ll fight for me? Or…’ He, slowly, trailed off, waiting for an answer.

Daniel took in a sharp breath. ‘Or? What exactly are you trying to insinuate?’ He could feel the anger in run through his veins. ‘Do you think that I enjoy watching all this?’ He snapped. He pointed at Lily, ‘All she does is whisper your name!’

‘And, that is a problem? So, will you turn your back, when I am being destroyed that is? You won’t watch it happen, but you’ll let it happen? Actually, did you call the so-called ‘higher power’ to come and get me?’ Kray knew Daniel didn’t deserve it, but he couldn’t get rid of these strange feelings. Someone else to sit and watch Lily sleep? Someone else hold her hand? Someone else kissing her wrist? Yes, he saw the scene unfold, but to kiss her? He clenched his teeth and flicked his gaze back to Lily.

‘Hell. This is driving me crazy!’ Daniel turned back to the window with frustration. ‘You and your constant changing emotions. Stick to one, for God’s sake! Sometimes it’s like you’re on your period, the moody swings! Kray, you need to-’ he stopped at mid-sentence. Kray was no longer standing near the door.

Shaking his head, he inhaled deeply and walked back to Lily. He flinched at the sight of the crack on the wall. Knowing full well the cause of the crack, he tightened his eyes together. He didn’t know who to be angry with most.

‘Lily, do I blame you for all this,’ he whispered whilst looking down at Lily. ‘Or do I blame Kray for his horrid stubbornness to refuse happiness for himself?’ Looking back at the crack, he asked.

Or is it me? Is it wrong to care for a friend? To want him to have a little happiness, even if it does shorten his life. Inevitable as it is. But, wouldn’t that put me in a good position?

He smoothed Lily’s hair and stroked her face. He, himself, didn’t like the idea of leaving Lily’s side, so how could Kray stand it?

‘Lily, at least I’m here. Just like when I cleared up this room,’ he began, slowly, ‘when all this breaks apart, I’ll clear up the mess and mend the broken pieces.’ He smiled, ‘Oh, and get rid of the unwanted pieces.’

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